A Former Gang Member Finds Life in Jesus
A little over a year ago I was in jail. I had recently lost my father to ALS (Lou Gehrig’s disease) and was struggling to keep my marriage together as my wife and I had been using drugs for the past three years. I was 40 years old and had no idea who I was.
That’s when God stepped in and started talking to me. I remember there was a Bible on one of the shelves in my jail unit and it was calling to me. But I was too full of pride to walk over a pick it up and start reading.
Instead, I engaged in typical jailhouse jargon with the other inmates in my unit. We would tell jokes that are categorized as “Your mom” or “Your dad” jokes. They are juvenile jokes and often turn coarse, especially in jail. I remember hearing a “Your dad” joke and repeating it to a group.
In that moment, my heart was pierced. All of the sudden, the passing of my father combined the vulgar way I was talking about dads cut my soul deep. I went to my cell and started weeping. I was on my knees crying out to God, asking Him to help me, to save me. I really had no religious background and didn’t even know what I was saying, but I cried out for help over and over.
After that, I picked up the Bible and started reading it. I found all the answers to my prayers were in the Bible.
At the same time God was intervening in my life, He (quite uncoincidentally) was also working in my wife’s life. We had both been arrested for shoplifting. But given my long record I was kept in jail while she was released. With nowhere to go, God had led her to the Rescue Mission’s Women’s Facility where she joined the New Life Program. (Note: You can read my wife’s testimony in the January edition of the Rescuer).
In Jail I was able to talk to her occasionally and one day she asked me if I would join the New Life Program at the Mission’s Men’s Facility, while she completed the program at the Women’s Facility. I agreed and even renounced my gang affiliation—something that I thought I would never do.
I had been in a gang since I was 13. We would rob and steal to get money. I was in and out of jail, going to state prison a few times and once even to federal prison. At times my wife and I would do well and provide for our kids, but we would often slip into drug abuse again. After the passing of her parents in 2017 we abused drugs more and more. Our kids left to live with other family members, and we lost our jobs, housing, and ended up in jail.
But God showed me that living the gang life could not bring me joy. Instead I read that He promised that if I seek Him first, He would take care of me. So, I accepted my wife’s challenge. I wrote to the Rescue Mission and asked if I could join the New Life Program when I was released from jail.
When I arrived at the Mission, I was way out of my comfort zone. There were so many homeless people who seemed dirty and disheveled. But my wife asked me, “Don’t you trust God?” So, I stayed. I trusted that God had brought me to the place I needed to be.
Through my time at the Mission God has made me into a new creation. Before I came here, I didn’t even know what a pastor was. Through the Bible studies, counseling sessions, nightly chapel services, and fellowship with other men struggling to follow God and stay sober, God changed me. I met people who helped me grow and learn.
At the Rescue Mission God taught me how to love other people. In the past, there were times when I would look down on homeless people. Times when I thought I was better. But God humbled me. Helping the homeless through my work therapy at the Mission has shown me that the homeless are just broken people. They are no different from anyone else who might have walked in their shoes. I learned I am no better than any person who finds help at the Mission.
I discovered a great church that my wife and I go to called New Creation Church. We even have a Marriage Coach there who is helping us build a stronger relationship. My kids are connecting with me and remark that they believe I have truly changed. My daughter even gave her life to Jesus after seeing the change in me.
When I moved to the work phase of the New Life Program last month, I was turned down for several jobs because of my criminal background. Just when I was starting to get discouraged, God led me to a job opening and they took a chance on me despite my background. We make bricks for various construction projects. It is hard work, but I am so thankful. I read in scripture that I should do work with all my heart and as if I was working for the Lord and He will honor it. So that’s how I try to approach every day on the job. God even arranged it so my job is right off the TRAX line.
Before I came to the Rescue Mission my marriage was broken, my kids were fed up with me, and I was using drugs every day that I wasn’t locked up. Now my life has changed. I haven’t used drugs for a year and all my relationships are better. On the outside I look like this mean gang member, but on the inside I am full of God’s grace and the Holy Spirit. I think God will use the way I look as a testimony to others that this is what Jesus can do. He can change anyone, even someone walking around in a body that is covered with tattoos.
My wife and I will graduate from the New Life Program at about the same time, in the summer of 2021. We are saving money and want to get a place together. We want to get our driver’s licenses and a car, so we can visit our family. Mostly we want to live together as sober followers of Jesus, seeing what He has in store for us.
I can’t thank the supporters and staff of the Mission enough. My life was a mess and I was at rock bottom. The New Life Program gave me the foundation for God to change me. Thank you for saving my life, my marriage, my family, and giving me a new hope.
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